I share these experiences for our lesson so that some of us / or even one person can draw from them.
This story is shared with permission!!
One day about 5 years ago I got a call from someone who was introduced to me. So her concerns and area she wanted God to visit her were her job and business. So we discussed , prayed and I said, “ I will pray and hear what the Lord will say about both issues ( job and business.” So that conversation ended.
One of the days as I spent time praying for her , the Lord showed me a revelation about her marriage, that her and her husband were no more together. Now I was confused and I was like Lord, she didn’t discuss this with me , we didn’t even go that route at all.
So I put a call through to this wonderful child of God and the first thing I told her what the Lord showed me, that was how she unloaded. She was called into ministry, husband knew while they courted and agreed to support her, both her husband and herself had held several successful programmes but along the line, husband felt people were giving her more attention than him, then competition began, husband too started men’s forum/ fellowship, husbands programs would always clash with wife’s programs. Eventually because this issue was not properly managed / handled it led to divorce.
Here is my take on unhealthy competition in marriages:
Couples are meant to be partners, seeking the good of one another.
Couples are not suppose to be in completion but understand their individual callings as it fits into the bigger picture of God’s purpose in their marriage.
Couples are meant to lift one another up and support each other’s gifts or talents
Couples are meant to be secured and each one comfortable in the area of calling
Couples are meant to make compromise (s) for one another.
When we lack the above, relationships become unhealthy , trust is broken and two people who were once in love begin to drift apart.
Communication and understanding is a crucial element in responding to each other’s needs.
It is equally essential to ask how best we can support one another’s goal or vision.
Dear Couples:
Your partner’s success should be your success.
When you support you spouse’s vision , you are automatically giving room for your own growth too.
When you give your spouse a ladder to climb, that same ladder she/ he will use for your own success.
May the Lord grant us peace and security in our homes.
